Philadelphia Stories

                    photo by Greg Campisi

A Safe Port in a Storm
by Jim Dengler, friend and board Member of Holy Family Home

Growing up in Southwest Philadelphia was like living on a ship. The bow was Most Blessed Sacrament Church and School. This parish provided us and the city with some of the best athletes of our time, for both college and pro basketball. It is located at 56th Street, between Chester Avenue and Kingsessing Avenue. And the stern was the Little Sisters of the Poor Home, which is located between 53rd and 54th Street, between Kingsessing  Avenue and Chester Avenue. This ship could have been called the ‘S.S. Saratoga’, because all of our phone numbers began with SA... like in the jingle for the ad for ‘Saratoga 2-2900.’ Does anyone remember what ad this phone number represented... I don’t?

In the middle of the ship was Mitchell school yard, which was a public school. This school yard was a second home for a lot of us, especially the boys, and what a blessing it was for our mothers too. It had something for all of us... can ball, box ball, stick ball, hop scotch, etc., and the best thing of all was that you didn’t have to be a good athlete to join in the games.  It was also a great place to meet a person that matched your personality; it was like our own eHarmony.com. At the dances, we were even willing to share our boyfriends and girlfriends for a dance; it just came naturally, because the boys didn’t know how to dance anyway. This ship was full of givers, and some of them would give you their last cent, but we all felt that we were in the same boat. Maybe someone had a basketball, or a football, or a softball, or a glove, that we needed in order to play our day away, or someone had a soda they were willing to share. How many times did we ask for a swig, then wipe off the top of the bottle with our dirty hand, and then down the hatch it went, ready for the next guy to take a swig. And last but not least, that is where we learned to play pinochle, which many of us still play today.

The IHM Sisters at Most Blessed Sacrament School gave us our life jackets in faith, hope, charity, and of course, discipline. And sometimes they gave out a little bit more of the discipline if they thought you needed it, in order to keep our ship afloat. But over the years the ship got old, and most of us have abandoned her, but not so for the Little Sisters of the Poor, they are still there giving of themselves, and to those who need it the most... the poor! Our family lived only a half block from the home, so we went by the home almost every day, either on our way to get the #13 trolley car, or to go to Edges Drug Store to make a phone call, because many of us didn’t have a phone in our home, or to Tip O’Leary’s Store, which we loved because they sold everything there... cheap!!! But there was one thing everyone knew, and that was you would never jump up or over the wall surrounding the home, as tempting as it was to see what was on the other side, because as the song says, they “had the meanest junk yard dog in town.” Some kids would rather stay and play in Mitchell schoolyard, while others would volunteer in the home’s kitchen or laundry room, or help assist the Little Sisters in taking care of the Residents, and some of the boys would serve as altar boys at Mass. But I would bet none of them left without something good to eat, for the Little Sisters’ hospitality is the best. And many vocations blossomed at that time, mostly because of kids being around the Little Sisters while doing volunteer work for them.

I can remember the Little Sisters coming around in a black truck going door to door begging not for themselves, but for the people in their care, and they all seemed to be so little. I guess God wants to show us “how little people can do big things”... like not only giving the poor a place to live, but making their new home full of love and compassion. Today, the Little Sisters go to the South Philadelphia Food Market to beg for food from the vendors there, and they have always been very generous to the Little Sisters when they came, even in times of depressions, recessions, calm waters, or exuberant times. So many of the food vendors have been so giving for such a long time, that we wonder how we could live without them.

If you are lucky enough to know someone in their care, please stop in and say hello, for you will find in their home one of the most beautiful environments that one could ever hope to be living in. From the time you walk in the front door, you can feel the warmth of the employees, or see a volunteer giving a helping hand to a Resident, or just walk down the hall, and you will see the shiny floor smiling back at you. But best of all is knowing that the Little Sisters are not there because they have to be, but because this is their whole life, doing what God has called them to do 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. Just think about how hard it is to take care of one person, be it your mother or father for 24 hours a day, let alone taking care of 100 of your loved ones. Their foundress, Blessed Jeanne Jugan, in 1839 took in a blind woman who had no place to live, and also gave the woman her own bed, so this became the start of the Little Sisters of the Poor. And this is how the Little Sisters treat every Resident... as if the person was their own mother or father!

I remember one day  I was making a  visit at the home, when Sister Winefrid stopped me and said “Oh, Mr. Dengler, would you do me  a favor?” I don’t  remember why I couldn’t help her, but I know it was a small matter. So I said to Sister that I was sorry, but I couldn’t help her. Well, with the saddest eyes and a sincere holy heart, her head went down, then she said “Oh, I feel so sorry you can’t help us.” She then paused for a second, and then she looked up, and with such a beautiful smile, she said “Don’t worry, I will pray for you, so that the next time you get the opportunity to help, God will give you the graces you need to help.” I was speechless! Here Sister was feeling sorry for me that I was not receiving the graces from God needed to help them. Well, that was a day I’ll never forget!

About 20 years ago, Mother Mary Vincent started an advisory board to help with a lot of red ink issues. The home was a million dollars in debt and going south, but the help of so many good people, and with the help of several fund raising events (which are still held each year), in a couple of years they were able to get out of debt, which helps keeps the ship afloat. Two of my favorite events are the Irish Night held in March at Cardinal O’Hara High School and the Garden Party. If you should go to the show, there is a good chance you will run into some of your old neighbors, or see friends you knew from the Shamrock Club from many years ago. But my favorite event is the Garden Party Car Raffle held in September on the grounds of the Holy Family Home. For this event, Marie and I get together with about 30 of our oldest and closest friends, who come faithfully every year to this event to support the Little Sisters. Most of them are themselves from the old neighborhood (MBS), so I’m sure that seeing the home and the neighborhood again, brings back many fond memories for them too. Also, some of them help the Little Sisters that day by volunteering to help set things up for the Garden Party, and then bartending for the party.  What a pleasure it is to see so many of my friends on this day working the bar from the inside, instead of the outside!! Our crowd has such a good time together at this event, that one of our guy’s daughter planned her September wedding date around this event because she knew none of us would want to miss the Garden Party... now that says it all!! Where can you go for $100 (price of a ticket) for two people, have a cocktail party with good music, lots of shrimp, cheeses, etc., then a full course dinner with different desserts. While you are waiting for your name to be picked for your new car, you are sitting under a large open air tent that fills the beautiful gardens of the home. But if your name is not picked for the new car or one of the many other prizes, you are still a winner, because you are helping the Little Sisters of the Poor. So when you are driving home in your old car, don’t be surprised if it feels like new, because you will be filled with the spirit of Blessed Jeanne Jugan!

I have been on many boats in my life, but this is the only one my wife Marie would sail with me, be it in a storm of changing course to make a meeting, or going through bad neighborhoods to get to a peaceful, loving, safe port, knowing that when we leave the port, we will have our sails filled with the beautiful Spirit-filled wind of Blessed Jeanne Jugan to help us sail through life’s journey. May God continue to bestow his blessings on the Little Sisters of the Poor, for all the love and care they give our Residents around the world!

“What happiness for us, to be a Little Sister of the Poor!”
“Making the poor happy is everything...”
–Blessed Jeanne Jugan  

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How privileged we are as Little Sisters of the Poor
to serve Christ in the person of our Elderly
By Sister Amy Elizabeth, lsp

"Then I, the King will say to those on his right, Come blessed of my Father into the Kingdom prepared for you from the founding of the world. For I was hungry and you fed me; thirsty and you gave me water;  I was a stranger and you invited me into your homes; naked and you clothed me; sick and in prison, and you visited me."

Then the righteous one will reply, “Sir, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you anything to drink? Or a stranger and help you? Or naked and clothe you? When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?"

And I, the King will tell them “When you did it to these my brothers you were doing it for me!”                                               
Mathew 25: 34-41

How privileged we are as Little Sisters of the Poor, to have the opportunity day in and day out, to serve Christ in the person of our seniors.  Our Mother Foundress took Jesus’ words seriously and applied them in her daily life. She spoke little about herself or her endeavors, but her works of mercy spoke volumes. This is the example that is bequeathed to each of us, her daughters.

No matter what country, state or home we live in, we unite with our Residents and employees to form one large family. Many though we are, we remain vigilant to always recognize each Resident as the unique individual God created in His image and likeness; and we strive to love them with Christ’s own love. Living in the same house facilitates our availability to serve them night and day.

Their needs may vary from physical, psychological, emotional or spiritual, but love is the universal medicine and treatment of choice. The opportunities to manifest “His” love are limitless;  a smile, a hug, sitting down to chat with them, praying with them and for them, accompanying them to an appointment,  clipping their nails, feeding someone with Alzheimer’s Disease, giving a whirlpool bath, visiting them in the hospital, entertaining them at parties ,etc.. The Sisters and staff do all they can to emphasize the Resident’s strengths and not their weaknesses and try to be ingenious to keep them included in the mainstream of the homes daily activities.

The good days and bad days, the joys and sorrows, intertwine all along the journey leading back to the Father’s arms which is the culmination of our apostolate. I am so proud to be a daughter of Blessed Jeanne Jugan and for the grace of discretely continuing her legacy into the 22nd century.

I know I have received far more from the Residents, than I have given over the past 28 years and pray that I will have many more years to be the instrument of God’s love.

“When you are near the poor, give yourself wholeheartedly.”
- Jeanne Jugan

Like Blessed Jeanne Jugan, the majority of little sisters will escape the public eye and remain discrete witnesses of the kingdom.

Where Charity And Love Prevail
By Mary B. Worthington, The Bulletin
Published: Thursday, December 04, 2008

In 1991, Leonard Poncia received an unsolicited appeal from the Holy Family Home in Southwest, Philadelphia. Most people do not think twice about such solicitations, but Mr. Poncia had been praying for several years for a way to give back to the community after the death of his mother.

His mind was filled with memories of her generosity.

"My entire life that my mother was on this earth, she always gave back," said Mr. Poncia. "Every week someone was receiving money or clothes or food.

"When my mother went to heaven, I started searching for some way to continue in my own small way her giving spirit."

Mr. Poncia had attended Drexel University located mere blocks from the home run by the Little Sisters of the Poor for elderly who are not able to afford health care. However, he had never heard of it, so he called for a tour.

There, he met Mother Mary Vincent Mannion, LSP, a Catholic sister who had dedicated her life to serving Christ through the poor in the spirit of founder Blessed Jeanne Jugan.

Known in her religious life as Sister Mary of the Cross, Blessed Jeanne Jugan founded the religious community in 1839 at the age of 47. The sisters take the religious vows of poverty, chastity and obedience, plus a fourth vow of hospitality. It is that fourth vow that distinguishes them.

The sisters have been in Philadelphia for the past 140 years, where they have been serving the poor of all races, religions and creeds at three homes. The only condition for entrance is that the person be poor.

"Our mission is to take care of the elderly poor in a home-like atmosphere," said Mother Mary Vincent, who now resides in Pittsburgh. "The come to live, but we are there for them as the die, to pray wit them, to be with them as they pass from this life to the next.

"Our apostolate is even more needed today," she explained. "There wasn't a threat as before of killing the elderly [through euthanasia]."

"We are a witness to the Gospel of Life," said Sr. Veronica Coyle, LSP, administrator at the Holy Family Home. "People deserve respect until death. It's too bad: both ends of life are vulnerable."

Among the 33 homes in the United States and Canada, one home remains in Philadelphia, the Holy Family Home. Currently, there are 99 elderly Residents who live in the home, the oldest is 102-year-old Mary Hagan.

The sisters care for each of them as if they were their own family.

"We can't take care of everyone," said Sr. Veronica. "But, we try to take the best care of those entrusted to us and to respect their lives."

Dressed in the traditional habit and veil of Catholic religious life, the sisters also spend recreation time together plus four and a half hours in prayer daily.

Of prayer, their founder once wrote:

"Jesus is waiting for you in the chapel. Go and find him when your strength and patience are giving out, when you feel lonely and helpless. Say to him: 'You know well what is happening, my dear Jesus. I have only you. Come to my aid ...' And then go your way. And don't worry about knowing how you are going to manage. It is enough to have told our good Lord. He has an excellent memory."

The Little Sisters trust in God through the generosity of the community in order to properly care for the elderly entrusted to them. Men like Mr. Poncia fulfill that role, and for that reason, he along with Brother Richard Kestler, FSC, received this year's "Spirit of Jeanne Jugan" award.

"It's a labor of love," said Mr. Poncia.

As he accepted the award, Mr. Poncia told a story from the day his relationship with the Little Sisters began. An encounter with an Italian Resident whose name was believed to be Theresa showed him that it was God working to bring him to the Little Sisters. The encounter was unique because until that point she had been semi-comatose and unresponsive.

"I started to speak to Theresa in Italian and like a light suddenly shining out of darkness, Theresa started speaking with me and there wasn't a dry eye in the room," said Mr. Poncia.

"What you give pales in comparison to what you receive in return. Everything I've done in the past 17 years has been so very personally rewarding."

You can volunteer at the Holy Family Home with the Little Sisters of the Poor by contacting Director of Development, Liz Burns at 215-729-5153 ext. 1415

Little Sisters of the Poor Philadelphia Story
by Catherine Moffit – Social Services

I first met the Little Sister of the Poor back in 1972 when I was in the 8th grade.  The Little Sisters came to my grade school to talk about their mission at St. Michael’s Home for the Elderly.  They brought with them two Residents who were absolutely charming and delightful.  They asked if anyone would be interested in coming to help them for a weekend.  My girlfriend and I volunteered for the weekend and we both fell in love with the Residents. 

At the time when we started going to the Home the Sisters had maybe one or two employees.  The Sisters did all the work and we were there to help them.  Imagine thirteen year old girls putting old people to bed, feeding, soaking feet, scrubbing floors, watching with the dieing. I could go on and on.  When we were working side by side with the sisters could just see the love in the old people’s eyes and it was mirrored in the eyes of the Sisters.  Nothing was too much for them.

The elderly have their own personalities, fears and hopes.  Age does not diminish one’s humanity.  I have been inspired by many elderly who have weathered illness, death of a loved one, poverty and alienation during their lives and have still kept the faith.

The Little Sisters have always been a big part of my life.  They are my extended family and many of them have watched me grow from a teen to a young woman.  A a kid there were eight or nine of us who faithfully came to the home every weekend to help the sisters.  We had our own dormitory called “Three and one half” and there we would spend our weekends giving the Sisters grey hair.  To this day the nine of us are still very close and when we get together we have many a laugh about our days at the home.

I do not know where my path would have taken me had I not been blessed with meeting the Little Sisters.  They have been there for me whenever I needed them.  My father is now a Resident in or apartments and it is a relief to know he is being taken care of with love and dignity.  The Little Sisters will always have a special place in my heart and I can never thank them enough.  They have eased many a family’s burden.

Little Sisters of the Poor Philadelphia Story
by Don Carter – Director of Plant Operations & Maintenance

My first experience with the Little Sisters was when I was in first or second grade at Most Blessed Sacrament School.  The school was having a canned good drive for the Little Sisters Home down the street.  I wondered how the Sisters could live off tomato soup because that was all that mom would part with.  Little did I know that one day I would be helping stack all the canned goods that would be coming in on food drives – and it’s not just tomato soup!  People are always generous to the Sisters because they are aware of their mission and the work they do.  Many of the older men I meet who had lived nearby in their younger years remember serving Mass in the morning before school or helping out around the Home in some way.  They also remember the wall which rose high up from the property.  The older women have all kinds of stories of helping out around the Home and being touched by the gratitude of the Residents.

When I was a little older we would play half ball on 53rd street outside the Home.  Sometimes we would hit the ball over the wall.  Then we would jump on the wall, scope out the grounds to make sure that none of the “ladies in black” or the dogs were around.  Only then would one of us jump inside and fetch the ball.  After a while jumping on the wall and teasing the dogs became a game.  (Sorry Mother Odeil).  We would run when the Sisters came out.  If our mothers had known, we would have been dead meat!

Then in high school I got into an after school/summer work program and was sent to work at the Home.  At that time the Home was set up in dormitory style and it had a mens side and a ladies side.  The men hung out in the TV/smoke room which had its own barber shop, full size pool table, high mounted TV (high tech for the times) which was very cool.  The Sisters believe that cleanliness is next to godliness so we were always busy cleaning.  Everyone had assigned jobs.  Many of the Residents would help to clean up after meals, help run the dish machines, clean the tables down, etc.  There was a lot of work to be done and the Sisters, Residents and staff would all pitch in and we would get it done.  At that time there were few lay people working at the Home so you could find yourself working anywhere which was good.  You would get to know all the Residents and they would get to know you.  They would always be praising the Sisters and telling me how good they had it here.  That’s when I started to realize how the work of the Sisters made a building a True Home for the Residents.  This showing of true love for our Residents carries over to the employees.  It has helped me to keep focus in life and know the true meaning of caring for our elders.  I recall one day running an errand for work.  I called back to the Home to let them know I would be back shortly.  The receptionist said “you’re not coming back to work.”  She knew that the Little Sisters is my home – my second home if not my first.  The Residents have always welcomed me into their house and treated me like I was their grandson.  So I have 50 grandmoms and 50 granddads!

When I am out and mention that I work at the Little Sisters someone in the setting will be aware of the Home in some way.  Maybe their mom or dad was a Resident or an aunt or uncle.  The words are always positive.  Sometimes they volunteered here or family members have.  But no matter what, everyone who knows the Little Sisters of the Poor knows of their deep love and commitment to the elderly.  The Home is a wonderful place to live but also a great and loving place to work.